Just saw a maroon grand am stop on my street, the driver opened the door, vomited, and then drove away like nothing happened. Been there, done that.
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
Fucking Canada. At least when they wake up tomorrow they're still in Canada
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
the cab driver said that we weren't the worst shit show he'd ever seen, CHALLENGE ACCEPTED!!
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
We had sex in the morning in pregnant lady position. Like fuck me like the hott piece of ass that I am, not your wife of 7 years.
About 98% sure I just walked by some dude jerking it in the library. I'm guessing his college experience isn't going as planned
He woke me up because I was snoring and went for a second round. First time I'm happy that I snore
I just unmatched him. If your Thirsty Thursday only consists on the gym then I am not the woman for you ✌🏻️
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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