You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
dude i just saw the hottest 13 year old but she was kinda ghetto.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
His mom told be she once got turned down for playboy. 1 biggest mistake Hugh made. 2 is she hitting on me?
the only muscles i have these days is kegels
The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I was using my Beauty and the Beast blanket as a makeshift skirt because no pants
The Australian strangers convinced me to leave him behind when they started chanting Aussie Aussie Aussie, Oy Oy Oy, and told me they had a bunch of beer at their place.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
So I scratched the whole boyfriend plan and got wasted. Wanna try again tomorrow?
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
I knew you were on something when you said you were a puppy and you ate all the frosty Paws dog ice cream which says not for human consumption right on the side of it.
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