Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
I just spent the last two hours on the phone with Emily trying to explain to her how to finger herself.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
Dude stop singing. Your life is not an episode of fucking glee
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
If Bret Micheals dies..will VH1 have to go off the air?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
He fucks like those drill things that you see when you think of texas
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
I need a drink and a shade of lipstick that will put the fear of God in a man's heart.
I just watched my ex butt chug a quart of eggnog. Why did I dump her again?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
You really do take on your dog's personality she sounded like her pug breathing when we were going at it.
because nothing says “let’s fucking rage” like getting a compensation letter and some company stock
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