how can u be prego again
i'm so hungover...i might vomit in a handbag instead of selling them
i'm gonna be such a cougar when i'm older...i just facebook stalked my little sister's 13 yr old boyfriend while drinking a bottle of wine....
Ok so the guy below me is either having sex very loudly or is very lonely
Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
hey bro how do you do that fake vagina thing with the tp roll? im bored.
We banged through her entire lady gaga playlist. I can die happy now
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
Is it possible to hurt your vagina working out, because I think my Dumbass accomplished that... 😯😟😒😓
Do I even want to know?
its 8 and I'm HUNGOVER!! how is that possible??
Help. Why am I so naked?
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