Just threw up in a trash can by the ATM. Then pulled out money for weed.
I love taking my adderall while im in class! As soon as I take the pill out everyone around me just stares in envy!
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
We fucked in your water heater closet. Told you we'd try everywhere.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
you have a wonderful penis attached to someone I'm having a lot of problems with right now
I tried to get you something for Valentine's Day too but they said they couldn't deliver skittles and ecstasy :(
It's been hot as balls outside. It's like getting tea bagged by the Sun.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I'd probably lick every tooth in Carly Rae Jepson's fucking mouth.
Teen Choice Awards are on if your wondering.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
Sorry I had sex in your backseat while everyone was in the car
It's quite alright. I found his shorts in my backseat, not sure what he was wearing when we dropped him off
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
We need to stop calling him that. I definitely said “Fuck me harder Swizzle Dick“ while we were doing it and it got weird
He should appreciate that I recommend that corkscrew cock of his! I’m getting him laid
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