I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
I just watched nsync videos for the past half hour and you could totally tell lance bass was gay in all of them
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
But theres a keg here and me gusta
the lesbians just got naked and went into the ocean... this never happened when i was a camper.
Dude I'm at a bar, and there's this Elvis impersonator here that I went to rehab with. Apparently Elvis has left the wagon.
I only blacked out one night of three if that isn't fucking personal growth idk what is
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
