tuesday night obama will do an address about the oil spill at 8... it'll only be about 15 minutes... but i think thats plenty of time for a drinking game. key words "oil" "bp" and "responsibility"?
Fuck yes. Let's make bingo cards.
There's just something about a dollar tree pregnancy test that screams THIS WASNT PLANNED!
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
The bellhop gave us weed in our keycard envelop. We went down to tip him and he apparently never gets that so he just gave us more weed. Kentucky is strange
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
Jesus christmas you are like the Martha Stewart of threeway planning
If a raisin and a desert had a bastard child that would be the inside of my mouth right now
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
Her mom is a nurse who got called in to declare someone dead. Just got wing manned by a corpse.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
so, in conclusion, I think his gf found out about the booty pics
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
the bucket list is making me question my morals...and sexuality
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
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