i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
After doing lines off my chest, she said, "do you even know how fast I could suck your cock right now?!!" and her friend said, "yea she totally could".
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
Smoked a Vape in the library status: completed
Me too it's so nice. Debated studying out there but woulda been 90% babe-watching 5% flexing 3% studying and 2% talkin my boners down.
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
My roommates don't agree with the whole tv in the bathroom idea. Fucking barbarians.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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