More tranny stories later!
Twist it, pull it, flick it... Bop it was like the first time I touched myself.
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
Farmville is her only friend.
He was legit dry humping me to the sportscenter theme song, awkward i think SO.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
You got kicked out of the strip club for spilling a tall boy on the stage and when the bouncers came to take you out you told them that they should probably go clean up your pee in the back corner cause they didn't seem to notice that
I am literally using a balloon as a pillow on a park bench.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
Swear to god this chicks brother got let out of jail for the weekend for the sole purpose of cock blocking me
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
You know why I love being a regular at this bar? It's because at a certain point last call is only a suggestion.
Its like people have to train for months before they try and drink with us and survive...
This town reeks of teen pregnancy.
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