I told him to come back in 5mins cause i needed to take a few more shots before i could talk to him
I think im in love with that girl with the googlie eyes last night. She was looking in my eyes and at my dick at the same time. we are going out again tonight.
i just made my gag reflex go away.
There is an old man sitting across from me. Phone rang and his ringtone is children giggling, I'm not safe here.
I just smoked a bowl in the dining room and am now drinking a glass of chocolate milk. i can't believe i'm getting paid for this.
Weddings at vineyards should never be allowed to happen. I'm pretty sure I drank every bottle they produced in 2008.
he's from indiana, of course he's clueless about "g-spots"
should i go to class, or party with a mariachi band?
meriachi band is very tempting, do they have dos equis?
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
Well if I'm going to hook up with every ethnicity by the end of undergrad, I need to be moving on
somebody went from crying while watching Full House, to a full on emotional raging bull...I love this time of the month
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
Randomize
