is your mom at the bar?
can you explain to me why you commented on every one of my profile pics with "tits and beer ftw" please and thank you.
well i was about to unbutton his pants but then i realized they had an elastic waste-band, so no, that didnt happen
they just tried to tell me they weren't big into drugs. A) it was the 70's. B) I've seen the pictures.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
omg i hate the new neighbors. why cant a bitch just be hungover in peace on a wednesday morning.
No, the real question is if you drink like I drink why WOULDN'T you wear a cape.
I think that's the first time Navy dress blues and a Ninja Turtles onesie have been involved in the same makeout.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I've officially slept with/dated two guys that have gotten tased. What the fuck is wrong with me
Bruh. He just said the words "cyber sex"-is it 1999?
I'm one bad relationship away from owning seven cats.
Topless, eating sour gummies, doing a crossword, at 4 AM. TELL ME IM BEAUTIFUL!
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