She really thought E.D. was a sexually position.
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
I drank almost a whole fifth last night. Woke up with blood everywhere wearing a "stereotype this" tshirt. How fitting
can your parents tell?
i just had a cookie in one hand and a phone in the other and tried to eat my phone...they know
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
SOS. HE HAS PASSED OUT AND IS LYING ON TOP OF ME. HE IS STILL INSIDE. HELP
Straight guys just can't stay away. My penis must have pheromones or something.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Do you remember doing synchronized hip thrusts to Michael Jackson? Probably one of my favorite parts of the night
YAY! I just removed my own stitches, and I'm only bleeding from one spot! on a related note, do you think a dishwasher will sterilize forceps and trauma shears?
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
I'm glad you had fun with your genitals.
Randomize