WHY CAN'T YOU EVER SHIT LIKE A NORMAL PERSON, JESSE.
so she sprained her ankle somehow and her friend had to carry her out while all 7 of us watched. do we even need to vote on that or is that automatic induction into the hall of shame?
he walked out as i was licking snow off of his car...
Went to 3 separate liquor stores today and I just made a huge tray of jello shots. This will be the Thanksgiving that puts all the others to shame.
we are still finding bottels filled with his pee. tom almost drank the one in the frig
They are taking turns pissing on the fire. This is my life.
Its mothers day, andI woke up with 12 bar stamps on my face, holding orange juice and a box of tampons. This can not be happening
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Also, it was so cold in that bathroom that I saw my crap steaming, a first in my life
But you put your finger in my ass and the rest is history
I decided to do drugs in front of her because if anyone can handle the truth it's a ghost
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
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