I just saw a girl play flip cup with only her tongue
I'm in love
And we will make penis cookies and eat them suggestively
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
like semen in my mouth is absolutely disgusting but i'd still like to experience it
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
he forgot there was a midterm today. i watched him break his own finger to get out of it.
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
Side note... I would pay good money to have witnessed the reaction of onlookers as I sprinted down Armtiage with a 15 lb bag of peanuts under my arm
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
I just threw up 34 cents. What in god's name did we do last night?
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
Don’t fucking talk to that dude from monday!! Ethical consumption dude, don’t fuck shitty guys
It was some weird herd predator-evasion instinct. All 15 of us took off running in different directions, and the two cops just stood there, perplexed. They had no idea who to chase.
Randomize
