Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
If we both finish he brings me a beer and cookies, if only he finishes I get wine and cheesecake. I think I'm in love.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I'M WORRY THAT MY VAGINA WILL NEVER KNOW THE TOUCH OF A MAN AND YOU ARE MAKING A MIXTAPE
I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna write gay mortal kombat fanfic. May the gods be praised for whisky
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
No joke. There's a picture of the priest I made out with on my parents' refrigerator.
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
After he came, he took a two minute power nap and then fucked me for another 45 minutes. He is a machine!
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
