I think I saw a glimmer of recognition, but she must not have been able to make me out through all of her whorishness.
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
just peed in the tub. didnt notice the passed out drunk guys there until a minute in
Rehydrating your liver back to life is never a good idea.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
Our DD painted my costume on me for tonight. The strippers have been teaching him how to paint costumes.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
My mom is coming to visit today & it's giving me anxiety. I feel like she can see through me & into the whore I've become.
I’m inviting a few of my favorite manwhores to a pool party. Bring booze and wear your banana hammock so Amy can see what I’m always talking about
Randomize
