If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
The walk of shame out of a freshman dorm isn't so bad when you're 25, nobody questions you because they think youre gonna bust them for having weed
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I just googled "can they trace a vibrator back to you" so that' s how my life it going.
So I sent him a snap of me half naked holding a pie last night.
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
I knew I no longer wanted to bone him when he put the Grease soundtrack on as "mood music", no guy looks attractive singing and dancing to greased lightning naked.
I woke up on the hammock spooning a box of Cheese Itz.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
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