yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
its amazing how hard it is to tell vomit from stuffing the day after
Slut skills are useful in every country.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
creepy tank top guy is at campus health. he's hitting on a girl recovering from a panic attack.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
Thanks for getting me stoned. My manager started quizzing me about the menu and I struggled until he asked me to describe the tortilla soup. I said "tasty"
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
In between explaining the best feminist lenses for the myth of Persephone and doing vodka shots with my friends she dragged me into my car and gave me an Earth shattering blow job. Honestly I think I'm in love.
'allo, good sire. how dost thy day goeth?
oh no. you're at that weird Renaissance Festival thing again, aren't you?
I am an inebriated elf. you may fucketh off.
Randomize
