whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
I kiss like a newly born barfing kangaroo
I'm on the bus going to class. And a cop just rolled by and I got nervous because I didn't have my seatbelt on. I have to stop smoking so much weed.
you're close to getting here right? Because if you're still not here and I have to get dressed to answer the door for the pizza guy, i'm tipping him $100 on your credit card to spite you
She said i kept moaning her moms name instead of hers
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
They are the perfect team. One always has weed, the other always has cigarettes. They're like the Batman and Robin of drugs
She makes margaritas with lemon-lime 5 hour energy..thats brilliant
and you were wondering how she got into Harvard
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
ok so i took my anxiety medication and i'm eating junior mints and i think my vagina will be ok
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
Randomize
