New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
she said it was okay because they were "professional" nude pictures of her on the internet
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
I fucked her and then she made me sleep on the floor next to her bed because she 'has a committment problem'
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
The sad thing was my husband told her its ok to make out with me. Bar Tuesdays will live on regardless.
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I feel like someone poured gasoline and bleach in my nose and lit it on fire.
Why! I don't feel that at all!!!! I feel jipped
I'm the only person who goes to break up a friends with benefits and comes out with a boyfriend
He's getting so into these sexts, I hate to tell him I'm fully clothes, watching Bring It On and eating chips and salsa.
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
i woke up this morning from the best one night stand. i made the guy mickey mouse pancakes for breakfast and when i walked back into the bedroom he said "marry me"
Sorry I totally pulled a home invasion on you last night
That was super inconsiderate of me
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