I don't care if he is my ex... I have the deed to his dick until someone else fucks him. We broke up 2 years ago.... I am still holding that deed!
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
I am thinkingif I am doing snow Angels in your living room, I probably had too much to drink
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
STOP LICKING HIS MUSTACHE
I've literally never felt worse
My body feels like its decomposing
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
One day this summer I just wanna get blown under the hot sun all day.
Deal. Roof-top 69 on Saturday, July 20th. I've got it in my calendar.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
My liver has officially said "fuck this shit" and escaped from my body.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Randomize
