My wife caught me jerking off, I had to tell her I was thinking bout her
Dude, Erin Andrews has a nude video circulating the internet.
Is it any good?
Let me put it this way: I bet Stuart Scott's lazy eye went straight after watching that.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
I reached in my backpack to pull out my laptop. I found my bottle of Jack and 2 bottles of Coke. It's going to be a good class.
I have a music final in an hour so I put all the classical songs we need to know in a shower power hour playlist, beer included.
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
Theres a freshman smoking a pipe on campus. This new class is setting a new standard we're not ready for
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
So he got the TA job but i told him its not official until we have a quickie on his desk. He offered to break into his office. He doesnt start until this fall.
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.
Randomize
