Her sister's ass was worth my getting thrown out of the house.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Home, forcing the cats to make out. Someone should get some.
I can only get completely wasted and hungry two more times and then we're out of fritos.
true friends will drive 3 hours to come smoke a couple blunts with you on the bridge where your car broke down
6 beers, 3 orange crushes, & half a fire ball later & you get my alter ego.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
To the point, I hope I remember where to put my dick when I finally get laid again
You have a 50 50 chance
going on fb and having 11 notifications all from you is absolutely horrifying
I'm texting you know although you won't get this until you wake up. the only reason you are strapped to your bed is because you were trying to fly out your window.
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
i told them you weren't like that.. and they laughed at me?
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Randomize
