you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
if your leaving for the weekend then im farting on your pillow
Um....I woke up to a lipgloss covered bottle of Jack daniels in my arms..
You've kissed worse.
i just had sex bonerless
i may or may not be watching the land before time
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
guys i just found a dildo in the laundry room and its purple
whats a dildo? isnt that like a fancy piece of bread?
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
she said she could "feel the heat of my groin" against her. ruined the whole fucking moment.
four days late. damn you, makeup sex. you win again.
he said 'i love fucking you, ashley'. it was the most romantic thing he's said during sex because he actually used my name.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Ever walked into a basement full of 10 guys jerking it to a live stripper? Cause I have. Always confirm the address of a house party. Always.
When I told her I was deaf and took my hearing aids out at night to sleep, she said it must be nice not having to hear drunken roommates having awkward sex late at night.
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