you dont seem to understand my overwhelming need to watch space jam right now
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
I rarely go in there. Unless it's for mini cadbury eggs and whiskey.
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
I have this terrible fear I might accidentally text a pic of my dick to my grandma
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
are you putting in a lot of effort today like appearance wise
I am taking my rightful place as emperor of the undead appearance wise
Dude...I slept walked to the free condom bin in the lounge last night. I don't know why.
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Worst wingman u don't do ANYTHING but laugh at my incompitant shyness
I. Love. Skype. Sex.
I think it's just been too long since actual dick has been inside you that you only THINK you love skype sex
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