I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
They have some sort of agreement that they can sleep with other people if it helps then achieve their goal, or something like that
How awkward
Yeah it's pretty fucked up
I think Saturday night will always be a mystery to me, except for buying an excessive amount of birthday shots for everyone and yelling BIRTHDAY SHOTS before every shot.
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Did you know there is a guy on the porch, wrapped in your snuggie, singing no woman no cry and drinking wine coolers?
It was good. Ended up having a 3 hr make out session with her
What is this high school
There was a lot of catching up to do bro
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
If the smell of things stopped me from putting things in my mouth. I wouldn't be popular with Grindr guys.
I'll never lecture you, go get that dick baby girl make momma proud,I didn't raise no quitter
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
Your sister walked upto me in the middle of the hallway and was like get us beer or shes never having sex with you ever again, wtf
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
Just learned a very valuable life lesson. Never motorboat a cat when they have claws.
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