I cannot find my penis.
please say your awake. the girl i brought home last night...any idea on a name? she isnt up yet...
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
in the event that i am dead, my body is laying in the intersection of ... the pearl in springfield. it was my friend's 21st but i think i'm dead. wearing a black top. like i said, probably dead.
I think he may have called me a bar rat, jokingly. I said i was but in a non-trashy way.
PS Can you transmit a UTI to a sexual partner? I tried to ask, but the doctor just told me to abstain (sup Bristol) for my own good w/o answering
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
My vagina can tell he is in a metal band. I dont know if I can sit down.
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
And by "hammer out the details" you know I mean spending 20 minutes on wedding plans then getting wine drunk, right?
So the keyword here is "hammered"?
How was the birthday sex?
Shit got outta hand. Honestly I think even my STDs have STDs.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
Idk what I'm more afraid of...checking my bank account or my STD results.
Randomize
