trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
I just got hard thinking about a crunch wrap. Im done
I don't think it's considwred fine dining when you're passing out at golden palace in chinatown at 4 am with you boss who happens to be wearing a dress.
Dude he's the best wing man ever. He starts creepin' on a woman, and she clings on to you out of fear.
Well, I tried to shit into my refrigerator. It was a rough night.
I have got to stop taking so many uppers and downers simultaneously. My life is a Dali painting.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Apparently there was a black out and the security alarms went off except I was convinced it was the microwaves and made ben unplug them all then got really frustrated cos he wasnt doing it right
Hahaha more like walk of pride. You entered the lions den last night.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
BRING KITTENS I AM A GENIUS
You used his ass cheeks to demonstrate how to play the bongos and he still called you the next day. That's true love.
We're going through the drive-through at mcdonalds while pulling sam behind us in the wheelchair and having them hand him the food. Let me know how this went in the morning
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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