He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
like the penis drawn on my face is so detailed and well done, i'm not even upset about it.
He left with a pair of dress shoes, some goggles, and a shot glass. I think we should follow him.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Drunkenly auctioned off my bed for 3 tequila shots
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
If you happen to tell anybody my drunk story in the near future, please refrain from telling them about me shitting myself. People are getting the wrong idea and random people are messaging me on Facebook making fun of me for that
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
So question... If I'm sexting with uncircumcised guy, do I have to add *then i gently pull your foreskin down*?
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
How does one acquire holy water?
It went from a "chill game of beer pong" to "absinthe body shots and a tits parade" in literally two minutes.
Told you inviting her was a good idea.
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