I heard you aren't going to graduate...that suck sorry bro
I heard your girlfriend is trying to spread swine flu because she wants to wear one of those masks to cover up her broke ass teeth
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
I wish you had a penis so you could experience peeing out the window in front of a crowd of people leaving parties.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
Make sure you take the apple pie out of your pocket before you pass out.
Why did I wake up holding food tongs?
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
Thank god I work in a lab. This pinkeye is out of control and my safety glasses are the only thing stopping me from digging at my eye with a pen
Randomize
