i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
You're breaking my vagina 4 times a day I reserve the right to know your middle name.
i should not be allowed to orgasm that much in one day.
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
This is the third time that ive slept with him. He bought me more milk. I can feel the romance growing.
Most of the bar is playing trivia I'm playing destroy a relationship in twenty questions
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
Can we just smoke a few bowls and eat grilled cheese while drunk in our hotdog suits at 9am ?
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Cocaine is ok on a cleanse, right?
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
