just won the tropical speedo for $11. i didn't know they sold pussy magnets that cheap
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i just found out that washing ur bong in the dishwasher works. its been a productive day
I love how I just got my coachella ticket and ecstasy in a package deal.
my voice of reason is faarrr too drunk for me to listen.
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
We ended up on a hotel balcony in Daytona where she lured a seagull down with a pizza crust she found in her purse and preceded to grab it out of the air by it's neck.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Don't worry about me. I am infinite.
Talk shit all you want but with my new knife sharpener I have a lethal razor sharp pizza cutter. Fuck with me Mario I dare you!
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