I saw that some person on TFLN used a bag of wine as a pillow. I tried it last night. I forgot to close the spout. I woke up and thought my face had a period
we were doing it doggy-style and i felt him pop that pimple on my back.I have mixed feelings about it
It's officially time to start saving up weed money for the NCAA tournament
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
all i asked was if it was all the way in, and now im laying here alone. sensitive guys fucking suck
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
she made me take her to the grocery store to buy a gallon of sweet tea and a shit ton of band aids, the cashier asked if someone was hurt and she replied "not yet.."
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
He was like Sweeney Todd... But, without the killing people part.
So... He's a barber?
No. He's got crazy hair, and a revenge fetish. But he's hot. Does that make up for it?
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
To be honest, I'm more surprised when you're not high at this point
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