No, drunk sperm still make babies.
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
Everyone was high fiveing on their a walks of shame home. God im gonna miss college life
There is something depressing about eating toast in a dark living room by myself using a paper plate that says: "Let's Party!"
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I may have just flashed my roommate as he walked in while my towel was falling. Now he knows what an American sized penis looks like I suppose
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
I smell like a brewery and I have been drinking for 7 hours. This seems like a perfect time to tell my husband I want a divorce.
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
Being pregnant feels like you have a hangover everyday.. Don't listen to what anyone says about how wonderful it is
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
He kept spinning my wedding ring like thanks buddy I remember
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