listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
Following a car with a GPS. We don't know where he's going, but he probably has a better idea of where we're going than we do. Also, very high.
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
right before he busted, he moaned the british are coming.
only on the fourth of july.
A small child is toddling around the store, holding a coloring book and a shot glass. Thinking of you.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
He gave me a card that said "I'm so glad we found each other... In the pants" and a pat on the head... My walk of Shame wasn't so bad.
The bartender just hugged us goodnight. I think we go there too often.
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Trial is expected to last a fucking week if I get chosen.
To be fair, you are the kind of person I want to be on the jury when I inevitably end up in front of one.
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
You're the best thing in my life, followed closely by cannabis and trashy romance novels
And somehow i feel like your expectations will turn out to be illegal in some way.
Randomize
