How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
He only dropped the Russian accent after we started having sex.
Good for him. He wanted to accomplish walking across niagara, I'm hoping to accomplish not throwing up tomoro nite, we all have our own priorities in life.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Hello. You don't know me, but word on the street is that we are now eskimo sisters. I feel like we should go out for coffee and compare experiences.
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I was giving him a blowjob but we had to stop because he started crying when his cat walked in and started staring at us
That guy I hooked up with in new york last 2 statuses are "I'm going to be a father, it's a girl" then "wow syphilis sure does burn" I'm legit scared... What has my life come to.
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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