physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
I just realized I am holding a beer in 133 out of 134 photos of me on my facebook page.
Nobody is perfect
I'm at Waffle House wearing one of the paper hats in the other
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
Is this like a "I'm taking you out to dinner and treating you with respect" kind of date, or is this a "I'm gonna fill you with alcohol and cheese and stuff my dick in your anus" kind of date?
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
You know he really cares when he gives you one of those on-the-go toothbrushes for your walk of shame before running to work
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
So instead of going to meet her mom, I decided to jump out of her window which was about 1.5 stories off the ground. I'm alright, but I ended up meeting her mom anyway.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
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