is it bad if i hope guys are like edward cullen and can read my mind. i could be a whore in disguise.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
he just told me i make him happier than drugs. that's some serious shit right there
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
The great thing about vietnam is that if I'm drunk during the day people just think I'm being white
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
He sent me a dick pic, and it had smeared lipstick on it. So I sent him the pic of my tit with the hickey ring your brother gave me.
i'm at work, alone, drinking a spiced chai & fireball hot toddy. holiday OT isn't that bad after all.
I can still taste your cum in my mouth and my in-laws are coming over. This should go well.
That's true. Ask me when I'm not fucked up. Nvm hold on. Btw. Wikipedia dinosaur. It's fascinating
I do not recommend playing football on LSD like at all
He's a security blanket. A security blanket who FUCKS.
I know you're having a really bad day and I'm a little to blame for that and I'm sorry. To make your day go better just try to imagine what people's fuck faces look like.
Randomize
