is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
I got drunk and applied for two credit cards last night. About to find out if anyone in this world is still dumb enough to give me credit.
Hypothetical question: If I threw up in the dishwasher do I clean it up or just turn it on? :(
We have to talk through the words with friends chat so his gf won't find out
And on top of all this... he just told me to "chill my nips."
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
You're mold. I may or maynot have puked blood this morning.
You told them that the brownies were safe, and then pointed to a passed out Ryan and said "see?"
I yelled at the dude who smoked him up "YOU'RE THE REASON I'M NOT GETTING LAID" then went to bed. So yeah, I guess it was an ok night.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
Welp just ran into my high school history teacher while buying a pregnancy test...there goes my veil of innocence in this town.
Randomize
