We have had massive layoffs this year, yet the guy who cant flush his shit seems to still have a job
YOU CAN RENT MIDGETS ON CRAIGS LIST
I told you not to ruin your birthday surprise!
Just so you know.. I just graduated college with your name still written on my chest
If that doesn't scream bromance I dont know what does
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
I had to call maintenance to come unclog the toilet.
Something to remember me by.
How are YOU going to look? Buying 40's on Christmas eve.
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
I gotta figure out which 7 tampons in the box contains the drugs
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
our next stoner-chievment: cream of shroom soup. Get over here, this is happening!
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
I just sang Hey Jude with a homeless man and then we drank beer together. Then I watched asians take pictures under a xmas tree for an hour and fell asleep in an MGM Grand bathroom stall. #AloneinVegas
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
It's not just going to appear. A lot of blood, sweat, tears, and leg work went into finding a cock that amazing!
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