the sham wow guy got arrested for beating up a hooker.
Can you please tell me why there's a bottle of urine on my night stand with a note that says "in case you're thirsty in the morning"? Thanks.
I don't know why girls would even talk to someone as drunk as I was.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I pulled out moves I did not even know I possessed, our fucking de-throned gods
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
Well I woke up naked, with a santa hat on, and a bag of beef jerky next to me. So yeah, I would say it was a pretty successful trolley
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
When you wake up with a bow tie and mustache drawn on your penis, you know you had a good night.
The amount of illegal things I've done this weekend is astounding.
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