Flying to Orlando on the 7th is cheaper than the 8th by like three margaritas.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Why did you leave me a note saying 'find the canary'
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
How's dinner? Come here? You can bring your boyfriend if you're ok leaving without him
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
I have 80 very blurry photos of you on a stripper pole...
I'll accept that I'm a woo girl. Just not the drunk cowboy hat wearing bar mongering twat bag type
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
Randomize
