my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
Planet Earth isn't gonna get stoned and watch itself.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Just think Febushuary. A whole month of 70's esque bush! This is the dream
Also this freshmen guy is talking about his gag reflex and no one is making blowjob jokes. I have no faith in the next generation.
with great strapon comes great responsibility.
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
While strippers were eating ones out of my boobs, several sources claimed trump shared classified info with the russians. We should get hammered on Mondays more often, bitch.
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
As a BFF it is your duty to answer when I drunk call you at 3 in the morning because I couldn't find a knife to cut that cake. I finally found one, fell asleep with it and the cake in bed. K thanks bye.
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
Now the fun stuff starts.
Someone is losing a finger.
Randomize
