Tell Heather sorry for burning her hair. Also for anything else that I may have done that warrants and apology. Anything after about 10pm is kind of hazy.
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
i swear i just saw perry the platypus. the fuck dude. i shouldnt even know who that is
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
i don't even want to say how many boners i've caused this week
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
I basically have sex lined up for me in three different countries. If that's not a feat I don't know what is
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Okay, tomorrow we'll have a day of life-sorting and plasma-selling.
Well at least I will forever be known as the girl he ate out on the lifeguard stand while people walked by. On the first date.
Kelly and I just had sex, and you didn't call or text to interrupt, are you alive? We are both concerned.
So from zero to dumpster fire, how shitty do you feel this morning? I'm hovering somewhere around trainwreck.
He's petting your head, we need to leave now.
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