I need to take "lollipop" off of every single one of my playlists cause it makes me wanna suck dick.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
Some milfs here doing some blow
Dad?
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
I mean I found and stalk his moms facebook.. that obsessed.
I will come to your office dressed as a bloody mary, hug you then leave is that a good plan?
yes. bring a barf bucket too. just. in. case.
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
I think you're too young for vagina rejuvenation but I guess you have never been one to listen. Sounds good! You bring the Percocet ill bring the vodka!
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
you need a warning label. Just announcing that you are Scottish is seen more as a challenge. Those guys have no idea what they are getting into.
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
Randomize
