so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Very drunk. laura says hi. i can't find my pants. i think i'm in philly, but it might be jersey somewhere
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
he started yelling "squirt for me" then his girlfriend knocked on the door and told us to keep it down
i'm not really understanding how she couldn't figure out it was him
you just started pointing at the light and whispering "star wars"
Ok I might come if this chair quits being so great...I'm also seeing this bush in the corner turn into a witch
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
So last night ended up making out with a girl going to jail on sunday...she wrote down her address so I can make conjugal visits...
He said I was the "egg mcmuffin" of blowjobs. I'm flattered.
It wasn't good. I can tell by the way he fucks me he watched too much porn
Last night at McDonalds, you lied across the counter, pulled up your shirt and yelled "BODY SHOTS"...
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
Well I didn't get a shacker shirt but I somehow managed to come home with superman socks
While he was fucking me, he just stopped and said, "Mike says Hi." Then proceeded to fuck me.
What did you do?
What do you say to that!? But, when I came, I screamed out my full name.
Randomize