Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
The National Anthem was on so I had to have a beer
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Whats your number? 5 or more?
Cinco. It sounds smaller in Spanish.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Holy sore nipples Batman
You need to stop vomiting in the washing machine, bro. For real this time.
Jello shots and homoerotic movie scenes bingo?
Waking up early to fuck the hot DILF the day before Father's Day because I'm respectable like that
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
You woke up in between the boxspring and the matress in a random dorm room.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
Randomize
