windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
he is not the type of person you only have sex with once. god adds years to your life every time you sleep with him.
I can't tell whether I'm throwing up blood or licorice.
I love Welcome Back Week...No I wont accept your god but i will accept that hot dog
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
turn left when you see the girl thats puking on the sidewalk. she hasnt been moving much so she makes a good street marker
I've had enough of this chick, she wanted to cuddle after giving me a handjob. I feel like I'm in junior high
There is too much vodka and too much dick.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
Just found out that his ringtone for me is a train blowing bc and I quote 'I know when you call I'm getting laid'
Just made out with the guy who gave me my tour. Full circle college win.
But the sex is so much better when he already has a girlfriend
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Used my brand new sperrys as a trash can to throw up in and woke up with someone's random key in my hair...new year new me:)
But seriously I might need help getting spray paint off of my body.... But don't worry about the penis I scrubbed him already
Randomize
