Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
hey can i play with your boom stick tonite? I'll let you shoot the love of jesus in my face.
come over
come over. we are watching hoarders and playing i spy.
Of course it's dangerous. Why else would they hire us after we failed the drug test?
and then you yelled "out of the way, i'm a lifeguard!" and everyone let us through
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
I just bought the ATT family protection plan so that I could block all of my old bar hookups from booty calling me...
I'm not liking this ratio of moving to blowjobs...
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Front seat of an Escalade in a limo-service parking lot. That is all.
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
I got copblocked.
What?
Cockblocked. By a cop. Copblocked.
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
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