So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
i would never do something against you youre the best i ever had
please tell me you did not just intentionally quote drake..
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
not only did i climb through the window at 4 am but here i am 4 hours later for my interview at the mall and i'm staring in the dark pet store barking at puppies
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
You're not required to sleep with every guy that spends $10 on you.
The only funny part about this situation was this morning when they rounded up all the drunks in the ER, piled us into a minivan, then dropped us all off at our houses.
Some Russian dude just came up to us and I'm pretty sure he offered his girlfriend to have sex for 80 bucks. Whoever said porn movies were unrealistic.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Why do you think it's a no-pants party?
Invite says "dress to impress". Her fault for leaving it open to interpretation.
I'm about to ride on a tractor i have no time for you
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
When you start lapping your martini like a cat it's time to go home. Partys over.
Randomize