dude just tell them you don't wear clothes. they'll understand
im going to have to ask you to stop vomiting stars, rainbows, and butterflies all over your facebook statuses...
So she said she wears a diaper when she's on her period and I'm not going to lie, I kind of want to see the diaper.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
Wait time out. Did I start last night with pants?
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
i spent my morning giving relationship advice to the kid i had sex with on a kitchen table this weekend
I'm just gonna stay I'm bed where it is warm and cozy and nobody knows me as the girl that puked on a stripper
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
you were caressing the jar of pickles then you looked down and whispered to them "I want you inside me"
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Was it you I was with where I saw a guy open a beer with his butt?
You poured a bottle of water into the salad bowl and said "bowls are a joke" and then poured it into your lap.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
Nothin ruins a fine afternoon like shitting ur pants
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