Well hello freshman 15, didn't see you there until I tried on last years summer clothes.
She fell out the car soaking wet and screaming "im wearing a fedora!" then tryed to seduce him on the front lawn in front of his middle aged neighbor
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
you better take a shot tonight for every cat you have ever seen and wanted. this is a lot of cats.
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
The bartender was shocked when I took the mop bucket from him and told him I'd take care of my friends puke.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
Either I'm tripping balls or my dog has super powers.
Remember camping when you drank 36 beers to yourself in one day and puked in your tent? Ready for round 2?
She was to tired for head so she opted for a footjob with poor results. I dont want to talk about it
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
I was grinding with girl while I was eating french fries, and she turned around to hook up with me. She ate my fries.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
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