doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
a kid in a transformers shirt tried to pick me up last night at work. he also rolled up on a bicycle, the kind with pedals. do i look that easy?
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
Great, now everyone thinks I've had giraffe semen in me
I don't even remember his name...i'm just gonna save it as birthday sex
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I just saw a man salute the budweiser truck on the highway. I want to follow him and shake his hand.
my dad is going to jail this weekend
where are we going to get our weed from?
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
I guess crabs is what I get for sleeping with my ex.
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
Randomize
